


Acrylic Nightmare

by Slackersunite



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Domestic, Fluff, Kissing, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Romance, lots of love, married, so much pettiness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-03
Updated: 2018-11-03
Packaged: 2019-08-17 04:04:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16509044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slackersunite/pseuds/Slackersunite
Summary: Peter gets his nails done and Wade is not happy about it at all. The domestic trials of the Wilson-Parker's.





	Acrylic Nightmare

Peter had had it up to the ceiling with Wade. They had been married for seven years and Peter loved his mans more than anything in the world. He loved his husband, but he was beyond frustrated and annoyed. Wade fucking Wilson had been leaving his garbage all around the house for the past week. Peter had told him over and over again to clean up after himself. Peter had been picking up laundry, beer bottles, wrappers, and doing extra dishes for the past week and he was this close to burning down the whole house. So, when today, he came back home to find a stain on the carpet and half eaten take out in the living room Peter walked right out of the house.

He walked out of the house and he went straight to the nail salon. He thought he deserved a day off. Today, he would treat himself to the prettiest and most expensive manicure that he had ever gotten. At the salon, Peter picked out his colors and designs. They were tasteful and expensive. After about an hour in the salon completely spoiling himself Peter handed the cashier Wade's credit card and walked out with long coffin-shaped acrylic nails. 

When Wade came home he was excited to see Peter. He was excited to get Peter in bed and make sweet-sweet love. Wade came through the front door and found Peter in the living room reading a book. "HEya sweetcheeks!"

Peter turned to look at him and hummed when Wade kissed him. Wade plopped down on the couch next to Peter. "How was your day?"

Peter shrugged, "It was alright. I got my nails done."

That's when Wade noticed the long shiny nails on Peter's hands. It looked hot! "OH MY GOD! I LOVE THEMM!!"

Peter smiled, he was feeling very petty, "I'm glad."

~

Wade had thought that the nails were hot and sexy when he had first saw them. But, right now he wanted to rip them off Peter's hands and impale the nail tech with them. Wade hadn't thought about them at all. He hadn't thought at all, and now he was beyond upset and annoyed.

"What do you mean you can't???!!"

Peter laughed and showed off his newly accessorized fingers, "It wouldn't feel good at all, and honestly I don't feel like messing them up."

Wade groaned and smashed his face into the pillow, "TAKE THEM OFF! TAKE THEM OFF!!"

Peter leaned back smugly, "I'm keeping them until they fall off."

Wade wanted to rip his face off, "STOP! STOp! Why're you doing this?"

Peter clicked his nails together. If Wade wanted to get fingered then he would just have to do it himself. In fact, if Wade wanted to have sex he would just have to settle for his own hands because frankly Peter was turned off by Wade's recent behavior. 

Wade ransacked his mostly useless brain for any clue as to why Peter would do this. Then he remembered a conversation they had been having for the past week. "Could you please clean up after yourself Wade?" "Wade, please don't leave your dishes in the sink." "I'm tired of cleaning up after you, just throw it out when you're done!"

Suddenly, the consequences of his actions dawned on him. Peter was usually pretty understanding of him. Peter didn't mind when Wade was occasionally messy, Peter never really complained about much of anything. In fact, Peter was probably the most easygoing guy in that department that Wade had ever encountered. But, a week's worth of cleaning up after his husband must have left even Peter a bit on edge. 

Wade sighed, "Is this because I've been kinda messy?"

Peter gasped in annoyance, "'Kinda messy'? Are you fucking kidding me right now? I've been coming home from work every day and every day there's a new mess. Why can't you just throw things out? This is your house too you fucking jerk! All I want is to come home to a house that doesn't look like there's been a frat party in it the previous night. Is that so much to ask?"

Wade sat up and held Peter's shoulders, "Come onn. I'm really sorry. I'll clean up, I won't do it again."

Peter shrugged. Words were words, and Peter wanted results. "Well, that's not gonna change the fact that these are glued to my hands and they're only gonna get longer."

Wade rolled his eyes, "Just go get them taken off."

Peter laughed, "That's not likely. I like these nails more than I like you right now."

Wade let go of Peter and slammed himself into the bed. He turned away from Peter and pulled the sheet around himself, "FINE! Be that way!"

Peter rolled his eyes and also went to sleep on his side of the bed as far away from Wade as possible. Was Peter being a little too petty? Maybe he was, but Wade hadn't paid attention to anything he had said before he had done this so Peter supposed his methods were working.

~

The next day, Peter came home not only to a garbage-less house but a freshly cleaned house. The carpet was stain-free and vacuumed. The counters had been polished, and everything had been dusted. The house smelled nice and looked nice and Peter absolutely loved it. It felt refreshing to be in the space. 

When Wade came home he looked at Peter with pleading eyes. He looked like a puppy asking for a treat. "So... how are you?"

Peter smiled genuinely at Wade, "I really appreciate it."

Wade's whole face lit up, "So, we can have sex?!"

Peter rolled his eyes and pushed Wade's face away, "Is that all you care about?"

Wade sighed and sat down next to Peter and holding his hand, "Of course not, but I just really really like that part."

Peter laughed and rested his head on Wade's shoulder, "Me too, but just cause you cleaned one day doesn't prove that you're not gonna revert to being a slob. Plus, I really like these nails.'

Wade groaned, "I hate all of this. I hate this whole fic. I hate everything!'

Peter laughed and got up off the couch patting Wade's head, "I'll make dinner."

~

The day after that, the house was also clean. The whole week went by and Peter didn't have anything to complain about. Everything was normal. Except of course, Wade's frustration with Peter's nails which he had lovingly begun calling his reoccurring "acrylic nightmare". So tonight, Peter had decided to initiate things having been purged of all his prior frustrations. 

Peter sat down next to Wade on the couch and kissed him. Wade mumbled, "What do you want?"

Peter laughed and kissed him again, "You know, I can think of a lot of things I can do that don't involve my hands at all." 

Wade groaned and leaned into Peter, "That's the sexiest thing I've ever heard."

Peter rolled his eyes and kissed Wade again. He thumbed over Wade's lips, and Wade bit at his nails. Peter smirked, "I know you like my nails."

Wade let his hands roam all over the man in his arms, "They're pretty fucking cool. And stupidly expensive jesus I just checked my account."

Peter laughed and kissed Wade pulling him closer, "I might have gone a little overboard."

Wade shook his head and flipped them so that he was on top of Peter, "Well, I might go a little overboard tonight."

Peter squealed as Wade picked him up and threw him over his shoulder. Wade took them to the bedroom and threw Peter on the bed. They both laughed and smiled as Wade crawled onto the bed straddling Peter. They kissed and Peter ran his nails along Wade's head and down his back. Soon, their clothes were on the floor and they were both having the time of their lives, completely in love with each other and not afraid to show it. 

"I love you baby boy."

"I love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked this. Hope I made you smile at least once. Have a great day!


End file.
